Milligrams

What is hypomania expressing itself? You never know you have it till it’s gone. So afraid now of loneliness, after the year or two up. Seems to be going on locust years — seven years gone now, should be coming back round again. I hope. The last one kicked me out of my state, sent me across the US and into graduate school for no good reason. Because I could. I wanted to prove to myself that I could get into Columbia’s creative writing school. That’s hypomania I suppose. I can hardly remember thinking during that time.

And yet, I want one of those to come back around again. I could use the energy and the zest. I don’t care where it takes me as long as it’s not back into more debt.